Once upon a time, there was a princess who had an engagement ring and wedding ring that fit perfectly.
This princess spent her days devoted to exercising and eating well to maintain the width of her fabulous fingers.
One day, the royal maiden fell pregnant and began to stuff her face with all and sundry, while exercise became a waddle around the perimeter of her company HQ to avoid actually doing any work.
By the middle of her pregnancy, the princess wisely decided to remove her rings so as not to face any embarrassment at the local A&E having them cut off.
Once the stork had brought the princess her bundle of joy, she went to return the rings to their rightful finger to live happily ever after.
The bloody rings wouldn’t fit. And Google is crap for finding exercises that tone up your fingers.
After 12 long weeks, the princess managed to jam the engagement ring back onto her finger. She kept it on for approximately 50 minutes before realising her finger had gone numb and was turning purple.
The princess now resides in her castle – ringless and miserable because she may have to live with fat fingers for all eternity.